Kid so defenseless in the adult world - is it any wonder that it often frightened of something? But adults often underestimate children's fears, considering them something serious. Meanwhile, psychologists say that to treat the child's fears need to carefully, otherwise this fear can remain in the soul of the baby for life.

All kinds of fears

What are afraid of children? List of common childhood fears can be very long: it depends on the age of the child; books a child reads, and films that he looks; baby relationship with parents and teachers in the kindergarten or school teachers. Most fears happens in children aged four to six years. At this age, kids are becoming aware of their place in the world and the fact that they are still quite inexperienced, and therefore vulnerable.

Over time, many fears are. A child every year becomes more and more sure of himself, he was not afraid of much, able to cope with many situations and learning to submit to the inevitable. Life experience has convinced him that a lot of trouble can be avoided if you follow certain rules. At the same time it weakens and faith in the different monsters.

Where are fears

Some children are afraid of the dark, afraid of the other snakes, and others are afraid of monsters, fourth afraid of some fictional characters, the fifth - the very real people and events. Why is there fear? Some of them seem to have got modern humans inherited from our ancestors. For example, it is clear that the person with the oldest long afraid of the dark, which could hide a dangerous predator. And this fear remained still, adults may simply convince yourself that in a city apartment probability of encountering a dangerous predator is quite small, and children are the explanations are not convincing.

All because of children's imagination. It is usually developed in children is much better than in adults, because it is only the imagination can compensate for lack of experience. But it's imagination can play with the child and a bad joke. The kid imagines something so clearly that he believes his own fiction. So, in a poem Chukovsky Korney girl draws "byaku zakalyaku-biting" and she herself is afraid of its own drawing.

Others also anxious mothers so carefully taught not to talk to strangers that children develop a fear of being abducted. Computer games or inappropriate age movies are added reasons to fear: the children may begin to fear disease, fires, various monsters and evil magicians.

Even the most cheerful children sometimes have a fear, it is quite natural. A sensitive and insecure kids are afraid of almost constantly. And the tense home environment, the fear may be more. Domestic violence (even to the child), alcoholism, drug addiction, complicated relationships, constant stress - all this leads to the fact that the child has developed a variety of fears. It is interesting that sometimes those fears at first glance have nothing to do with the actual situation, that is, the kid whose parents are on the verge of divorce, does not believe in the possibility of their separation Parting: punctuation rules , But it begins to desperately afraid of, such as dogs. The true cause of fear and denied replaced, and only work with a psychologist allows them to identify.

The methods of struggle

How to help your child cope with fear? Adults often make fun of the kid who is afraid of something, and even ashamed of it. But to do so not worth it: guilt is not less destructive than fear, and certainly can not be saved from fear. Therefore it is better to support the child, to make him understand that all people are afraid of something. At the same time I must say that it is impossible to give fears disproportionately influence on life. And for this it is necessary to deal with the fears.

How to do it? You can dump the entire contents of the cabinet on the floor to make sure that for hanging clothes is not a monster lurking. But this is not always helpful.

Adults are well aware that the more talk about their emotions, especially those emotions become weaker. This principle is based the work of many psychologists and psychotherapists. You can use this principle in everyday life. Let the child as much as possible talks about his fear. Suppose he says about it in detail. If you talk on your face is too scary, then you can share with parents to come up with a terrible story about a young child, with whom there was something very terrible. Let the story will be more and let it end well. With the help of their parents can find a way out of even the most intricate nightmare - as a last resort, you can always call for help good fairy with a magic wand, Albus Dumbledore or strict police.

Another good way - draw your own. Draw too should be as detailed as possible. And then you can add details to the picture, which will make the image of the terrible enemy is not so scary, and funny and even cute. For example, the terrible monster that hides under the bed can be decorated with small pink bows - so it will look much nicer, and it can even be friends.

If the child has any cause fear the very real situation is with him to figure out how best to behave in a particular case. For example, fear of falling on the rails in the subway makes it easy to use the subway following the rules: do not come close to the edge and to be smaller in the crowd. But if the kid is afraid of losing, should work out with him, that he memorized his home address and phone numbers of parents. A clear knowledge of exactly how to behave in a difficult situation, will help to get rid of fear and anxiety.

Maria Bykov

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