Parting - a difficult period that has ever had to worry most people. As part to cause the least pain, and how to survive the separation?

How to leave

Many people doubt that the correct ways of parting exist at all. Because leave anyway hurt, no matter how we tried to soften the blow. Nevertheless, it is possible to give up so that once a loved one remembered you with respect and gratitude - after the first sharp pain will pass.

• Do not fade away quietly. Never, under any circumstances, do not do it (unless it is a loved one turned out to be a dangerous maniac - and even then it is better not to keep quiet, and go to the police). The fact that you no longer love a person does not mean that he deserves to suffer in ignorance, inventing hundreds of reasons why you suddenly stopped calling and writing. No matter how hard it was, please be courage, and say go.
• Do not part of e-mail or text message. Such a method is much better than silence and avoidance of contact with the former partner. Call him, but better - announced his decision to leave in a personal meeting. Each person should be able to ask questions of someone who wants to part with it - it is much easier separation.
• Stick to the facts when explaining the reasons for breaking up, and speak very clearly. If you do not get in a relationship that you have, say so, instead of ornately explain that you're not ready for a serious relationship, you need a break, and so on (such explanations may give the false hope that the You'll be back). But do not go into details as to what you do not like in a partner: it makes sense only when you strive to keep the relationship and want it changed.
• Do not give a reason to convince you to come back. If you explain your desire to part with such phrases as "I am not worthy of you," or "I need time to sort out themselves" - that you will not mitigate the pain of parting, and gives a person a reason to think that he might have to return. Explains everything so that there was no doubt that the separation is final and irrevocable.
• Staying friends: to offer or not to offer? The answer to this question depends on the sense that the two have for each other at the time of separation. If one partner is still deeply in love with another, friendship will not work - will only be prolonged, and therefore even more painful parting. Friendship is possible, if the relationship is really exhausted, you broke up by mutual consent, but you are still interested to communicate with each other.
• Stop all contacts. If you are broke, you do not need to call former partner to know how he's doing - even if you are concerned about how he is going through separation. At first, try to avoid encounters, and if not, when they met a polite hello, and do not start conversations. Do not congratulate former partner with the holidays, do not browse its pages in social networks (it can see what you came). All of this, again, gives false hope, if the person is still in love with you. The best thing you can do - cut all the strings that you are connected and give a person a chance to forget you.

How to survive the separation

• Speak or write about their feelings

Although avoidance and suppression of unpleasant feelings and thoughts are natural for most people, they need to somehow express to move forward, freed from the heavy emotional load. It is especially important not to restrain their emotions immediately after breaking up: trying to control myself when you are overwhelmed with feelings, can lead to psychological problems in the future. Write about what you feel, in your blog, or just on paper, talk to family, friends, or a psychologist. Do not hold back: if you want to cry - cry if you are overwhelmed with self-pity - give vent to this feeling. And do not blame yourself after weakness: in fact, the ability, if necessary, to express their feelings - not a sign of weakness.

• Change diet

Often people (often women) to the Times parting diet - because the appetite is still there, so there is a great opportunity to lose weight. However, severely restricting your diet can actually be a sign of the subconscious desire to punish himself (deep down she could blame herself that she was not good enough, and so it is thrown). It also happens that the girl begins to eat much more than usual - for her food becomes a means of getting rid of stress, performing the same function as that for other people carry alcohol or drugs. Instead of having to go to extremes, start to eat a balanced diet: eat more vegetables, fruits, grains and legumes, give up sweets, fatty and fried, train yourself to eat four to five times a week in small portions.

• Start training

Exercise stimulates the production of endorphins, reduces stress and improves mood. Besides, it just helps to distract from evil thoughts: while jogging or training on the simulator always comes a time when attention is narrowed and focused only on the muscles, breathing and heart rate, which is considerably more than a hundred beats per minute. Bona fide sports - is a kind of meditation Meditation and women's health Which helps to clear the mind from time extraneous thoughts. After leaving many people just want to sit at home and feel sorry for yourself, but once you properly reprimanded and cry, it's time for action. Walk and exercise, but do not overdo it - excessive exercise can be a form of self-punishment, like overeating.

• Do what you love

Relationships take up a lot of time, and many people, as they are part of a couple, do not have time to do their favorite things. Perhaps before meeting with the former you loved playing the guitar, writing poetry, or just have a lot to communicate with friends? Now you have time again to do what you love. Try to see the positive side of separation: you will be able to devote more time to family and friends, learn a foreign language, and maybe even create a brilliant work of art, after all the suffering - a great catalyst of creative processes. In a word, plunge headlong into the nice things that you did not have time to feel sorry about something that can not be returned.

• Do good

Have you noticed that it is necessary to do for someone that good, albeit very small thing - and you immediately lifted the mood? Giving in many ways more pleasant and useful, than to take, but to help other people - one of the best cure for depression Depression . Become a volunteer, help an elderly neighbor to bring heavy bags up to the apartment, give smiles to strangers. Good deeds will help you to "redirect" has not yet been outlived love for former partner, and not let your broken heart Broken Heart: Steps to recovery   become stale.

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