As a rule, people can live side by side, taking care of each other and get along fine, until the case does not concern those issues that cause these differences. A few tips on how to avoid family quarrels, to help cope with differences.

Differences - this is normal

Maybe you might want to know that the debate - this is not necessarily a sign that you have a dysfunctional family.

If you are ready to build a deep and lasting relationship with anyone, and to be honest, you will at some point run into questions that the two of you look different. The same, of course, also applies to family relations. Although superficial relationships, which is not achieved the wealth of human interaction, it is usually less conflict.

Do not drink too much

When relatives gather together to discuss hot topics and thus consume too much alcohol, between them can erupt hot quarrel, after which it is sometimes very difficult to recover, and even dare to start communicating again.

The next time you are thinking with your family, try to avoid too controversial topics, and not lean on alcohol.

Learn to recognize topics that annoy you

When you're ready for the next meeting with relatives, think about what happened in the past, and about those issues that cause you have a strong reaction.

What feelings do you experience when something hurts you? Perhaps in the past, relatives do not appreciate your thoughts? Or do they prefer not to hear and not hear you? That at this time happens to you: what physical sensations you appear, and you start to behave? You may have stomach aches, or if you want to cry? Or are you pulling for another glass of wine?

Identify the source of his irritation, you can better control your anger.

Stay with myself

If you start to get angry or feel threatened, a good idea to spend some time alone and bring thoughts in order.

Ideally, we send our children to his room so that they could be alone Loneliness - this is not new, or why am I still alone?   and learn to manage their feelings. The same thing we need to do for themselves. Remind yourself that you are - a grown man, and your thoughts have value.

It will be quite normal if you are in a dispute decide to leave and say that you do not like a conversation, and you are too inflated.

Control your reactions

We can not control the behavior of others, as we would have liked, but we can control our reaction to their behavior.

Family relations are based on old habits. Someone may try to tease you by saying that you react too violently, or that you are too sensitive. Think for a moment: do you agree with that? If not, admit it, and that it may issue another person. If you do not react the way you did before, you will change the family relationship and, perhaps, encourage the other person to the fact that he, too, will start to react differently.

Do not hang tags

A man and his behavior - are two different things. You need to understand that lyudi- is more than their beliefs. People deserve respect, regardless of their views.

Do not fall into the trap of people hanging on labels like, "he stubborn," or "it's too straightforward," or "it adheres very right-wing," and so on. If you have a different opinion, you will only see the difference between you.

Accept the differences

Look the part on the dispute occurring at the table and realize that trying to change someone's point of view - it is almost always the case in vain.

Are people trying to share with others some information to help them to learn more, or they are trying to change the other person's belief system? The second is useless, and ultimately people want others to appreciate their opinion. Agreeing that between you and other family members may have differences, you will be able to show respect for them, and not to aggravate the situation.

Be open

You can ask the other person about how he came to his current beliefs. If you show curiosity about how a man came his point of view, you can begin between the very positive dialogue.

Do not think that you can read someone's thoughts, but try to put yourself in the other person can be very helpful.

We need to understand what the other person may just be afraid of you, as you are afraid of it. But we can have a humble their pride and do not think that our view is the only correct one: it's just a point of view.

Just do not argue

If you and your family again and again quarrel over the same issue, why keep doing it?

Think about and choose the topics you will discuss with their families. Perhaps this is not always the best way, but you can not argue about everything. Give relatives know their point of view, but try not to engage in debate about everything in the world - it's not worth it.

Remember why you're here

Even if your family meeting place during some important political events, they should not be seen as an opportunity to start a debate about policy.

Remember the main purpose of your meeting: to communicate with relatives. We choose our friends, but do not choose the relatives. However, we have to learn to live with them, taking them for what they are. It is also a very good lesson that we can give to your children: we can somewhat disagree with their families, but they continue to love.

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