A bad marriage can affect your health. Find out how to fix it. You may have heard that married people are healthier physically and mentally, than singles. But this does not apply to people living in an unhappy marriage. Such relationships may even damage the health.

Studies show that people are dissatisfied with their marriage, have higher levels of stress and are more prone to heart disease.

This does not mean that being happily married, you no ill, or vice versa, an unhappy marriage necessarily lead to disease. But it is indisputable that an unhappy marriage does not make you good.

Remember stress

If your marriage is unhappy, do not underestimate the stress that you experience on a daily basis. If you are constantly quarreling, nervous or worried their grievances in silence, you cause damage to your health.

Often couples can not solve their problems, for example, when one partner does not feel sympathy to another, or even allows violence. But for most families, experts say, there is hope, even if they are unhappy in marriage for several years.

The five most common bad habits in the marriage, and how to combat them

• Keep all confidence

Each pair had to overcome the test. But if you do not discuss the problem, the tension in the family will continue to grow as a couple and distance from each other.

One patient recalls how she avoided conflict with ex-husband when he was recovering from alcoholism. "I always tried to have him all was well, that he did not want to start drinking again. Therefore, nothing I upset him and did not say anything that might cause a quarrel. " This restriction of communication led her to depression Depression .

People who grow up in households where family members discuss freely with each other their problems, easily establishing communication with a partner. But people who have not learned these skills in childhood have problems, they need help to raise important issues in the talks.

How to fix: better communication skills. Try reading a book about it or materials on the Internet. You can also turn to a psychologist-consultant.

• Inability to listen

Everyone wants to be heard, but the couple in an unhappy marriage rarely listen to each other. It often happens that you do not listen to the partner, but pay attention to a word that is causing your negative reaction and started fighting.

When a person feels that he does not listen, it ceases to share innermost thoughts. If a person, on the other hand, realizes that his carefully listening, communication becomes more saturated

How to fix: the agreement with a partner to listen to each other in turn for three or five minutes, without interrupting. Try it and you will see the wife in a new light.

• Recrimination

The unhappy marriage, bogged down in quarrels and resentment, people are often accused of partners, rather than take responsibility for their own actions. But the prosecution did not help to solve the problem, they only increase the conflict.

How to fix: Try to find the true reason for which you are fighting. For example, you feel a lack of love, attention or respect.

If you find it difficult to figure out the cause, ask yourself what you recalled this quarrel. When you find out the reason, you will be able to change behavior.

• Take the other for granted

One of the most common problems in marriage - when one partner perceives the other for granted and become inattentive to the needs of the spouse.

Perhaps the husband stopped to greet, coming from work, or thanks for dinner. We all want to have appreciated, without it people feel lonely and unappreciated.

How to fix: show the husband that most of it - a modest gift or a simple gratitude. Spend time on the relationship, for example, plan an evening that you will spend together.

Perhaps you feel too angry or hurt to give gifts. Experts advise to still do it - and a wall of anger and resentment will be a little lower.

You can strengthen the affinity, remembering that you like in a partner before, and told him in a quiet tone that you are concerned about his behavior.

• Too fast to surrender

Do not refuse any help, especially if you are tired and not able to do to improve relations.

How to fix: You need time. Do not expect the anger will disappear immediately. Wait at least three months to find out whether the work helps to follow the advice of a physician or from books.

Changes may be slow. But do not be afraid to make small steps toward the goal. Even the smallest step can be very important for the long haul rapprochement.

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