Adolescence is often called difficult: to go through this time can be difficult both to the teenager and his friends, first of all - parents. Fortunately, a difficult age - it's not forever. Parents just need to ride out this period with minimal losses, and help move difficult period of her growing child.

Features adolescence

Almost all parents with fear waiting for adolescence. Children who only yesterday were so obedient and gentle, become completely unpredictable. They are rude, defending some ridiculous ideas filled for no reason at all in tears, shouting, "nobody loves me! "Become secretive and aloof or aggressive and assertive. Adolescence begins at nine to ten years and ends sixteen or seventeen years. However, the time frame may vary depending on the individual.

The body of a teenager is changing. The rapid growth of the skeleton may outpace the development of muscles, and as a result young people often look awkward, angular, complaining of pain in the limbs. There are secondary sexual characteristics, and it can cause a whole range of adolescent conflicting emotions from pride to disgust. Because of hormonal changes may temporarily impair the operation of all systems of the body, headaches, weakness and lethargy.

Hormones also affect the emotional state of the adolescents. The emotional background becomes unstable mood teen changing with frightening frequency, and intensity of feelings can be very strong. At this time, there are the first love - platonic at first, and then - "adult". Appears teenage hypersexuality.

Personal development

Significant changes undergo and personality of a teenager. From eleven to fifteen people trying to understand themselves, to understand their character traits, needs and interests. Many parents are annoyed that enthusiasm teenager changing almost as fast as his mood.

In the relationship with the parents start conflicts. Teens insist on their right to independence and resent any attempt to control. Maturing child is aware that it is still dependent on their parents, so trying to show their maturity by all available means: rudeness, lateness, smoking, alcohol consumption and sexual relations with their peers.

Relationships with peers become crucial. For a teenager it becomes vital status in the company of friends, teenagers dreaming of true friendship and true love.

What do the young people?

The answer to this question is very difficult: as a rule, young people themselves are hardly what they expect from others. They want to understand them, even though they are not always able to understand myself. Teens require respect for his opinions and his position. Teenagers crave independence, although it is not always willing to take responsibility for their actions.

By the end of teenage boys and girls formed a certain image of himself, which, however, can be very far from reality. Young people begin to have some idea of ​​who they are, how they want to live and what to expect from others.

Actions parents

Parents have little easier than their children experiencing "difficult age". The only advantage the older generation - their own experience and knowledge of that period, hormonal changes and personal instability over time must pass. Without this knowledge it is very difficult to live with a teenager who does not know what she wants constantly to something offended constantly demand something and otherwise demonstrating disrespect. Even the most tranquil teenagers often portrayed their neighbors surprises - such as dropping out of school because of unrequited love.

Parents of a teenager requires a certain flexibility. The authoritarian style of behavior and demands unquestioning obedience lead to ongoing conflicts that tire of all family members. Mindless connivance and removal leads to the fact that a teenager feels lonely and helpless. This could lead, for example, early sexual activity or antisocial behavior as an attempt to attract the attention of adults.

Parents have to give your child more independence. Explicit control is perceived as a terrible insult to a teenager, but a son or daughter, you can arrange a time to return home, if the talk "on equal terms" and not in the position of the controlling parent. It is advisable to abandon the dialogue by fiat tone and explain the reasons for their claims. Most of the teens appreciate when talking to them with respect, and try not to let people who are so with them are.

Giving your child the freedom of actions and decisions should be discussed with him the boundaries of freedom and liability issues. Between parents and adolescents is a series of agreements, responsibilities are clearly allocated, specify what the consequences would be offensive to non-compliance of certain conditions. It is important to immediately specify that the teenager for his actions will be responsible on their own, although it can apply to parents in a difficult situation for advice and help.

During puberty, children often move away from their parents, and it is very important not to pin disappear altogether. Understanding your child and its acceptance by any allow to keep good relations with them at this difficult time.

Maria Bykov

Related Articles

The crisis of three years: the first steps towards independence

Transition age: how to help the young person?

Children's tantrums: whims for parents

Children's fears: where they come from, and what to do with them?